The Main Heroines are Trying to Kill Me C.354: Her Despair

- Sha...

"Sob... Hugeuk..."

With tears streaming down her eyes, Ruby kept casting healing spells on Frey’s lifeless body.

- Fwooshh...

Her hands were already severely battered from using healing magic.

But regardless, she continued to pour out healing magic relentlessly.

"Please, please, please..."

"..."

"Please come back to me..."

With desperate pleas, Ruby buried her head in Frey's chest, but no miracle occurred.

Frey's soul remained absent.

In fact, it was to be expected.

What she was doing was healing magic that could only heal physical wounds.

If it were only death as a life form, there might have been a bit of hope, but naturally, restoring an annihilated soul was impossible.

- Shaa...

"No… No no no…"

Though she tried to deny it, tears streamed down Ruby's cheeks as the stellar mana embedded in her heart began to fade away.

One by one, things that could remind her of Frey were disappearing.

His traces were being erased from this world.

"Ugh, ugh..."

With trembling hands, Ruby grabbed her own head, and started tearing at her hair.

"Why does the truth matter so much? What's so important..."

While Frey’s memory palace crumbled so severely, she merely wandered around aimlessly and foolishly tried to read his memories.

If she had come out at that time and tried to stop the collapse of his soul with all her might...

No, at least if she hadn't disturbed his soul, the outcome might have been different.

It would have been better to just extract the memories embedded within his soul.

That way, she could have remembered the precious and beautiful moments they had together, but now they were also gone, along with Frey.

"I, I..."

And it was all her fault.

"What have I done...?"

Once she started blaming herself, waves upon waves of endless regret flooded her mind.

"Why, why didn't I accept him? Why?"

Ultimately, Frey ended up like this because he failed to save her.

In order to save herself from being corrupted into the Demon King, his soul was torn apart through countless regressions.

But even knowing that his soul would eventually perish after a long, arduous journey of regression, he never gave up on her until the end.

His last words and smile as he stroked her cheek still lingered in her mind.

On the other hand, what about her?

What about her, who kept boasting that she was the Demon King and would never do something like purification even if she was dying?

"Sob, uuu..."

In front of Frey, whose soul was on the verge of annihilation, she proudly clicked the reject quest button.

That wasn’t the end.

She fell for the Demon God's words, causing her to mull over foolish thoughts in her head, which led to mistakes.

She ended up beating the man who was trying to save her to death.

Come to think of it, Frey didn't even resist back then either.

He just wore a blank expression and took the beating from her.

"Ha, haaa... Haaa..."

Ruby's breathing became increasingly rapid.

"Sorry... I'm sorry..."

Overwhelming guilt gripped her to the point where she could hardly breathe.

"I was wrong, Frey..."

The one who made Frey like this was none other than Ruby herself.

Just a moment ago, he was alive and breathing. The man who had been incomparably precious to her. The man who had loved her until the end.

Now, only a mere shell of his body remained, pitifully slumped in her embrace, all because of her foolish choices.

"I-I'll live kindly. From now on, I'll live kindly, Frey."

In her mind, the moment when she had pressed the ‘Purification’ quest reject button kept replaying itself.

"I-I will stop doing childish things like conquering the world. I-I’ll belong to the Empire, and even be your dog forever. I'll disband the Demon King Army and wipe out all the back alleys. Okay?"

It was a sentence she couldn't have imagined uttering just a few weeks ago.

"So please… Please come back... Please come back to me, Frey..."

Of course, no matter how much she pleaded, it was futile.

"...Ah."

Ruby, who had been clinging to Frey’s body for a long time, finally muttered with widened eyes.

"R-Right."

It was a simple passing thought.

"I just have to accept the purification quest, right?"

There must be a reason why Frey had been so determined to ‘Purify’ her.

"Yeah, that's it."

If she was ‘Purified’ maybe Frey could live again.

That was certainly what was written on his note.

That was the way to end this damned game.

- Zing!

Ruby reached out her trembling hand and summoned the 'Help System.'

Fortunately, the ability bestowed upon her by the Demon God still remained.

"D-Demon God, are you listening?"

Looking at the 'Help' system, Ruby said with a trembling voice.

"Give me the ‘Purification Quest’."

Her heart was pounding so hard.

She might be able to save Frey after all.

She imagined the scene of him getting up and smiling, whispering, ‘I always believed in you’.

The scene of Frey embracing her as she cried.

Suddenly, for her, the ‘Purification Quest’ had become the only solution to save Frey.

- It’s impossible.

"What?"

But what Ruby received was an extremely cruel answer.

- You can only receive your 'Purification Quest’ once.

"F-Frey... But Frey received it multiple times."

- That was an advantage given to you.

Upon hearing those words, Ruby staggered, forgetting that her power was being mercilessly drained by the system every time she used it.

- Are you dissatisfied with the benefits you have been given?

Come to think of it, the world had always favored her.

An ability stronger than anything else. A hero who received the fate of a false evil. And she ended up acting as a pretender.

But these were things designed to drive the man that was more precious to her than anyone else into an endless abyss of despair.

"Ugh..."

Her mouth tasted bitter.

Her stomach churned.

It felt like she might vomit at any moment.

"..."

Countless atrocities she had committed against Frey, moments when he writhed in agony and torment, flooded Ruby's mind.

Then, she recalled herself, who had simply adored him in spite of it all.

She had said that it was good for beautiful things to be isolated and broken, and she was the one who harassed the man who risked his soul to save her...

"L-Let me regress."

Ruby kneeled and pleaded with her hands clasped together to the system.

"I-I want to regress too. I want to save him now. I'm willing to sacrifice my soul if necessary, I will pay any price, please..."

- It's not possible.

Yet again, the Help System responded firmly.

- Retry is a unique ability.

"T-Then, give me a chance, any way possible. Just once. Please."

Still not giving up, Ruby insisted.

- This is an incomprehensible question.

Of course, Ruby’s pleas were something that the Help System couldn’t comprehend.

- Please clarify the intention of your que...

"Ugh..."

Suddenly, Ruby collapsed.

She had paid the price for using abilities that required divinity too many times.

"Frey..."

Ruby, who slumped down next to Frey, caressed his cheek and whispered with eyes filled with despair.

"I love you too..."

Her eyes began to lose their light.

"Forever..."

Her once-proud ruby-colored eyes, filled with arrogance, began to dim.

"...T-That’s why, I have to find it."

Shaking her head vigorously, Ruby, with effort, began crawling toward the exit.

"I have to find a way, no matter what."

Tears of blood flowed from her eyes due to her overexertion of power, but Ruby paid no heed as she continued to crawl.

"I... I can't let you go like this. Never."

Suddenly, a smile appeared on her lips.

"...I'll be back, Frey?"

Eventually reaching the entrance to the motel, Ruby opened the door, then looked back, trembling as she spoke.

"You can’t go anywhere, okay? I'll cast a concealment spell here. You should stay here, okay?"

...

"Yeah, I love you too."

Once again, there was no response. Despite that, Ruby, with a forced smile, whispered and closed the door.

"S-So... where should I go now?"

She was smiling brightly as she walked down the street, but somehow, she looked like a broken doll.

“W-Well, Frey is probably hungry, so let’s buy some bread and soup first.”

"W-What's with that woman?"

"Is her face covered in blood? Is she hurt somewhere?"

"...Don't make eye contact. She might be crazy."

"Hehe, hehe..."

With a chill-inducing smile, she gripped her forcibly cleared head as she pushed through the crowd.

.

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Several days later, in a motel nestled under the descending night sky of the Western Continent.

"...Fuck."

The Demon King, her hair matted, and her entire body covered in blood and wounds, lay on the bed beside Frey’s body, muttering curses through choked sobs.

"Fuckfuckfuck."

A bundle was hanging limply next to her.

It contained artifacts taken from her dungeon, secret vaults, and residence—everything within her domain.

Not only that but the things she had been hurriedly stole from around the world were also mixed in.

From the secret vaults of corrupt kingdoms to the underground hideouts of back-alley guilds, and even the divine relics guarded by the Church.

There were also the artifacts she robbed from dragon lairs and the Great Forest, and even the elixirs from the Eastern Continent, the land of martial arts.

She swept away everything that was known to have the ability to restore her soul.

“...Sob, ugh.”

Yet, as Ruby examined the items, her expression hardened.

There were fewer items than she had expected.

While there was plenty to increase life force or heal the body, the items known to restore souls were scarce worldwide.

And she doubted their efficacy.

"I-I shouldn't have thrown them away..."

Ruby murmured with regret, staring at the unsightly bundle.

"It takes mere seconds to put them into the spatial storage... I should've just taken everything... Why did I stupidly discard them..."

When clearing dungeons or annihilating organizations that opposed her in the past, she had often burned the treasures inside with a haughty gaze.

It was a kind of display of power and entertainment for her, showing that no treasure could match her own power.

But now, she wanted to tear apart her past self.

There might have been items she destroyed that could have saved Frey.

She might have been able to see Frey again.

"Ugh..."

Ruby, cornered to the brink of despair, reached into the bundle.

"..."

What she retrieved now was the last item.

After scouring the world tirelessly, the items inside this bundle were all that remained.

All of those items failed to revive Frey, and only the last item remained.

"Please, please... Please, I beg you... I've done everything wrong, so please, help me, just this once..."

Ironically, the last remaining item was a small ring rumored to be a reward from the Sun God to the First Hero.

The usage was also simple. All she had to do was put the ring on his finger.

Then, it was said that a literal miracle would occur; some even claimed it could restore a shattered soul.

- Thump, thump, thump...

As Ruby recalled this legend, her heart pounded wildly as she raised Frey's hand.

This was her last chance.

There was nothing left in the bundle.

If even this ring couldn't revive Frey, she would have to bid him farewell forever.

"Please, please, please, please...."

With a more desperate heart than ever before, Ruby slowly began to slide the ring onto Frey's finger.

She placed it on the pinky finger of his left hand.

A ring worn on the left pinky finger symbolized luck for new beginnings and making wishes come true.

Perhaps this gesture would convey her desire to start anew with him?

Perhaps this act would serve as the catalyst to awaken Frey, who had suffered countless regressions fueled solely by his desire to save her.

"..."

But such a miracle did not occur.

Even after putting on the ring, Frey lay still on the bed, as lifeless as ever.

“M-Maybe it’s not going to happen right away.”

But Ruby placed her hands on his knees, hoping for even a small change to occur.

As five minutes passed...

"It’s only five minutes. It's impossible for a soul to heal in just five minutes."

Ten minutes passed...

“It’s a little late. I made some soup. It must have gone cold.”

An hour passed...

"..."

And as time passed, Ruby just stared at Frey until the warm soup cooled and became watery.

"...It's a failure, huh."

As morning dawned, and sunlight streamed in through the window, she took Frey's hand with a gentle smile.

"I'm sorry, Frey."

Then, suddenly, she formed her other hand into the shape of a gun and pointed it at her own head.

"Just like you said..."

She could no longer deny the reality.

"...I'll love you too."

No matter how legendary the artifact was, it couldn't mend a soul that wasn't just damaged, but entirely 'annihilated'.

Now, it was time to pay for her sins.

"Even in death, forever."

At that moment, a single tear streamed from Ruby's eye.

- Crackle!!!

The terrifying demonic energy struck her head.

-Thud.

And then, Ruby collapsed weakly beside Frey.

"..."

And silence began to fill the room.

"Ah, ah? Ahhhhhh?"

Ruby collapsed onto the bed in agonizing pain, watching blood flowed from her head, staining the bed crimson.

Her expression soon turned pale.

"I... I can't even kill myself?"

Although she didn't know it because she had never even hurt herself, let alone attempted suicide, Ruby was so strong that she couldn't even kill herself.

As the Demon King, she was literally immortal as long as there were no heroes that could kill her.

"Then... Do I have to live like this?"

Realizing this fact, Ruby muttered with a look of terror.

"...In a world without you? Forever?"

Gradually, tears began to fall from her fear-filled eyes.

"I... I don't want to."

Despite basking in the warm sunlight beside her, Frey's expression looked unusually pale.

"I don't want to!!!"

Staring blankly at his soulless body, Ruby began to scream in anguish.

"I'm sorry!! I was wrong!! Don't go, Frey!!!"

Soon, she buried her face in Frey's chest, crying like a child.

"Ugh, waaaah..."

The majestic Demon King had long since disappeared without a trace.

"Waaaah..."

Gone was the pretender who always wore an arrogant expression.

"Freyyyyy..."

In this room now, there was no one but Ruby, who had lost the most precious person to her due to her own karma.

"Please, please..."

Sitting beside Frey's lifeless body, Ruby cried like a child, pleading.

"Please come backkkkkk......"

Ruby's cries echoed through the morning streets, filling them with sorrow.

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Some time later.

"Sniff, heuk... heugh..."

It was around this time that Ruby's wailing ceased, and only the sound of her sniffles could be heard.

"Gu…Gu~."

At some point, Gugu who had flown to the window and was quietly observing her, quietly lit up her eyes.

- Shaaaa...

Then, the ring that had been placed on Frey began to shine.